Valentine's Day

This Valentine's Day marked the official anniversary of when Jeff and I decided to start seeing each other exclusively.  He was smarter than I thought, combining our anniversary with Valentine's Day, two birds with one stone.  Yesterday would have been ten years together, the best ten years of my life.

All of the grief literature and advice suggests that widow's plan ahead if they can for significant dates like birthdays, holidays, anniversaries, and any other momentous occasions they shared with their spouses (looking back now, every day I had with him is starting to look like a momentous occasion).  So I am a good student and I planned ahead so I would not be a complete and utter mess this Valentine's Day.

I invited seven of my closest single girlfriends over to my house.  I cooked them all dinner, complete with appetizers, two different entrees, and two different desserts.  All they had to do was bring themselves and their beverage of choice.  I also invited all of them to spend the night and I promised an enormous breakfast in the morning as well.

I asked my in-laws to move in with me to help take care of Jeff when he came home from the hospital  and I asked them to stay with me after he died.  I just couldn't handle being in this house all by myself.  So because I had all the ladies staying over, I gave them their first night off and they finally got to go back to their own house (which is only a few miles away from my house).  My father-in-law is quite the poet and he wrote one of his originals for me to read to the ladies. I just have to share it with all of you.  So here it is:

"To my favorite bitches on Valentine's Day-
There is something I just wanted to say.

Whether it be man or woman
Do we really care?
We just need someone to talk to-
To be with, to listen, and to share!

Tonight you are telling stories,
Drinking wine, and having fun.
Would you rather be somewhere else,
With a man, who is well-hung?

No, I think you are all happy
To be together tonight.
Because your friendship is like
Going from darkness into the light!

You ladies are some of the nicest
People that I have met in my life!
I sure wish that I was with you now,
But please don't tell my wife!

I am not sure I should have written this.
I could have gotten candy or flowers I suppose.
And if you tell anyone, I will deny it
Because as always, Bros's before Ho's"

We really had a hilarious, raucous, and fun night.  It went into the wee hours and we ate a massive breakfast that somehow I managed to not annihilate in my hung over state.  As they all trickled out the door they told me that it was one of the best Valentine's Day they've ever had.  I couldn't get through yesterday without not only those special girlfriends supporting me through that milestone without Jeff, but also my in-laws for uprooting their own lives to support me.  And of course, how can you not love a father-in-law who could write such awesome poetry!

No matter what you're going through, the highest moments to the lowest, please remember to love those who love you back, not just on that one day of the year but every day.  Life and love are precious.  Embrace and enjoy them every second of every day.