Sixteen Months

It's been sixteen months since Jeff died.

I'm trying to move forward and on with my life.

I'm trying to figure out what my new purpose is.

I'm trying to decide if I should even be dating.

I'm trying to do all this and not feel terrible survivor's guilt, which I need to remember is a natural part of what I'm going through.

I have noticed when I've taken the time to reflect on all that's happened, that I am having more good days than bad days.

I take comfort in knowing that my life will not be filled with only pain and suffering.

I am smiling more, laughing more, and loving more then I have in the past 3 years.

I am nourishing my relationships with friends and family and trying very hard to always remember to cherish every moment I have with those I hold close to my heart.

I am recognizing and removing people who are toxic from my life.

I am surrounding myself with people who are supportive and love me.

I miss my husband dearly, but know that he is always with me and literally loved me until the day he died. 

What more could I ever ask for?